Gosh, it seems like forever since I’ve written a blog entry. This has been a long week. Long and full of angst. My characters have angst. I have angst.
I’m writing a Desire, but I feel like maybe I’ve stuffed too much in it. I don’t have much confidence in my plotting abilities and may have mentioned that a time or two. *rolling eyes* Maybe I’ve over-plotted in my effort to craft a book that will hold the readers attention.
I love my characters, but Mason and his inexperience with love can be a trial. In short, he’s an alpha male who hasn’t a clue. He locked away his heart years ago, and tries to deal with everything in terms of integrity and obligation and buying his way to what he wants. Only Leilani wormed her way under his skin, and the price he has to pay to save his marriage is giving her the key.
Some CP’s love him, some would like to knock him up side the head because of his actions. And it’s those comments that fuel my own doubts.
Now I’m doubting everything I put on paper. Tonight it’s Lani’s turn with the angst, and I found myself tearing up with her. Damn it, I’m tired of writing books I think will be wonderful and then fearing they’re garbage when I’m done. Or even worse, the fear taking all the enjoyment of the book from you before you even write The End.
When does confidence in your writing set in, because I’m ready for it to kick in. Any day now.
CAROL BURNSIDE / ANNIE RAYBURN 
>Honey, let me know when that confidence kicks in, because I’m to the point where I need feedback on EVERYTHING, even book reviews. I sure wish I could remember how to trust my instincts.
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>Usually, if you have a character inspiring strong feelings, you’re doing something right. :-)Quit worrying so much. Write the book. Get it down. Squash the doubt demons. How do you envision the characters and the story? That’s what’s important at this point — not what I or any other CP thinks. Get it down, and anything else can be worked out later. When you begin trying to please everyone else, your voice becomes the price you pay. Does that make sense?And if my crits are causing doubt, then I’m not doing my job as a CP. Tell me to shut up. Or rather than sending chapter by chapter, write a few and then send to me in a block, so I’m seeing more of the story. Or tell me to shut up. Like Mary said . . . trust your instincts.
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>Confidence comes with experience, and yet I think for everyone there is always a nagging doubt. We’re creative spirits and art is so subjective. We’re never quite sure how our work will be received. Try not to think about it and just keep going!
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>It is hard to do it over and over and over again and still doubt and worry and be frustrated. Just keep going. The only way. Much empathy on that feeling though. been there, doing that.
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>I’m with Linda – if your character is causing strong opinions, you’re doing something right. It’s a fine balance between trusting yourself and listening to your CPs. Sometimes, what they say makes absolute, perfect sense, but it’s just not right for your vision and your characters. Or, what I find, is that sometimes I’m not ‘ready’ to hear what they have to say, if that makes sense. I think that’s the best part and hardest part of writing – there are no absolutes.Go with your gut. If your CP’s point out something that’s been nagging you too – then go with it. But if not, trust yourself and keep going. Sometimes it’s better to get to the end of the book your way, let it sit for a while and then take in the opinions.
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